It would be nice, but it's not a reality

The bag below is  the collection of gifts for my sister and niece that I have been carefully squirreling away since November.  It's not a whole lot - a toaster (she asked for), some homemade coasters and a matching bookmark, a book, a pretty pottery mug, some Starbucks coffee, bath gel from Bath and Body Works, PJ's set...and etc.  It was my intention to meet with her before next week to exchange gifts and have a quiet lunch.  Sadly, that is not going to happen, for reasons I will not go into here.  But next year will see a change in the way I deal with my former family.  It is what is is, and it can't be what I want it to be.  And you can't always get what you want, as the song says...

 I dropped it off at her door this morning, disheartened at the sterility of it.  But I am done worrying about it.  I'm not too concerned about her reading about what she's getting - she doesn't read my blog.

This is the stack of books my mother sent all of us for Christmas - somewhere I have carefully placed a previous letter from her detailing who is to get which book.  This is a huge step for my mother who generally proclaims that Christmas is cancelled and hasn't put a Christmas tree up in one of her homes since 1980.  I guess what God shortens from one end, he extends on another.  I am ever hopeful, but I am going to be much more pragmatic than I have in the past.  Already thinking ahead to the New Year...

P.S.  She never said a word about the gifts...